NEEDS Vs. WANTS
Because wants are based on feelings of desire, and needs are based on logically imagined futures, the special thing about needs, is that you can need a What, but you cannot need a WHO (because Whats are logic-based, and WHOs are not), and because of the fact that WHOs are purely emotion-based, you can only want and desire such a valuable thing.
The ability to leave a romantic relationship is exactly what proves its value. This mindset can be rather beautiful, not just for you, but for all of the companions that you choose to stand behind. The truest meaning of love, be it romantic, platonic, or otherwise, is that you’ve chosen to sacrifice your time, your energy, your effort, and so much more, for this individual. This includes sacrificing in love, for yourself.
The beauty lies in the fact that it is a choice. You want to be with them. You don’t need to be. In its most basic form, to love someone means three basic things. You want them in your life, you want them to love you back, and you want them to be happy. Strangely enough, the more you stop feeling a NEED to love yourself, the more easily you will... so long as you still WANT TO.
A NEED is easy to identify. If you don't have it, you'll continue to be in pain. If you do have it, that pain goes away. Pretty simple. That said, even if you "need' something, that doesn't necessarily mean the need is healthy. It sounds crazy to say in our present society, but in all truth, our needs only depend on our own wants. After all, you wouldn't NEED to eat, if you actually WANTED to starve, now would you? If you simply didn't WANT to live a successful life, you wouldn't NEED to survive in order to find that success. In short, you don't actually have needs to both thrive and survive. Survival is not the source of needs. Survival is a NEED, to reach the higher WANT that is your own definition of "thriving." This explains why some martyrs can feel okay with death. The outcome that this death will result in, is the highest sense of a thriving existence they could ask for, even if they'll only be truly thriving after they die. To them, the thriving comes from their memory living on, and so the death may be NEEDED. Honestly, when you think about it, being a famous martyr can basically make your influence on this earth immortal. Just take a look at Jesus Christ. Even if you consider him a work of fiction, that makes things even scarier when you realize that it only means that this martyrdom created a sense of thriving so powerful that it basically gave life to a man who never even existed. His thrival created his own survival. (Okay, dumb joke.) But again, the only reason that we have our "survival needs" is because we NEED to survive, in order to thrive by our own definition. You will only have needs to achieve what you want, nothing more.
