From Chapter 3:

"Your shirt isn’t WHO you are, but I can find out other Whats from it. If you’re wearing a movie shirt, I might hypothesize that you like that movie. I might be wrong, but it’s better than a random guess at what movie you like, no? Perhaps it was your sisters and it was the first thing you saw, so you simply grabbed it and put it on to head out of the house. This can be seen as a metaphor for when someone tells you about a time someone else did something. They’re telling you what someone else has, their experiences, and are using it as their own What, their own story for telling, as of now. You, the listener, may assume a theme that isn’t there. Perhaps the speaker doesn’t know what their point is, or perhaps you get it right and have a little bit more Whats, to help build a WHO profile.

The same can be said of buying a shirt because all of your friends have it. You may pick up different habits, opinions, or world views, and so much more from your friends. You may even pick these up out of spite for your enemies. An obvious example of this would be peer pressure.

Just because you know What someone has, does not mean you know WHO they are. It’s all a guessing game, but one thing’s for sure. If you feel strongly, and you think it’s about someone new in your life, you’re probably mistaken. You might hate What they’re doing, for example, but that doesn’t mean you need to hate them."