~ A Reliably Unpredictable You ~
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I think we can all agree that we all love our relationships with our friends, or at least that the yearning for the relationship is what holds us together, but when it comes to a romantic relationship, what holds you to them, is themselves. You love them. Your WHO aligns with them. You may have been attracted by the sound of their voice, a pretty smile, their curves, or their muscles, but at the end of the day, it's not those Whats that you love. You simply love them, for WHO they are. A good friend is simply the What that is attached to a relationship. The WHO behind this relationship is the WHO you're after. Your friend's speech, mannerisms, and/or whatnot, simply gave you the beacon for that relationship. It attracted you, saying "Hey! Over here! There might be a good time for you here. OVER HEEEERRRREEEE!"
A good formula to start picking at is this:
If you wanted the relationship, and the partner is just an added bonus, then you're friends. If you want the partner, and the relationship is just an added bonus, then you're in love.
This is not to say that we can't care deeply for our friends too, or that we feel no importance towards the relationships we have with our partners. It merely means that depending on the WHOs involved, sooner or later, one will often come to take priority over the other. Let's not forget though, that in many long-lasting, healthy relationships, the person you love romantically will also be like a friend to you, too. These two aren't mutually exclusive, you know? Both the relationship and the partner should become the top priority for you if you've found the perfect match. For long-term happiness in a romantic relationship, you need to both love WHO they are, and WHO the relationship is that you both share. This, for all of the reasons above, is why you must learn to love yourself well, to be both comfortable with yourself, but also what you do with yourself, in your own life. You must learn to love both yourself as a partner, and the relationship that you have with yourself, as a partner. Only the people who are comfortable living with themselves will be able to live comfortably as themselves. My friends, you will have to live with yourselves, for every day of your lives. Every time that you look in the mirror, they will be there in the room. Better to learn to get along with yourself, than to suffer with a crappy roommate and painful land/life owner.
There is also a spectrum to be maintained here. Because nothing is truly whole, or broken. Remember that every WHO has its own set of Whats. This creates an infinite spiral, both upwards and downwards. Each What from the set with its own WHO and therefore its own less impactful set of Whats, itself. The "teacup" obviously has it's own WHO, but so do each of it's pieces as well, whether they're whole or not. This list of Whats (What pieces) continues on forever, as an ever-expanding list of less important things to like or dislike, (based on their WHOs). For every layer deeper, like the teacup (Click here if you need a refresher), the pieces get smaller, and they have a smaller impact on you, but they DO have an impact. They're smaller doors, with less room for emotions or attraction to get through. So, for pretty much everything that exists around you, or even the Whats that you have within yourself, like plans or memories, there will often be a mixture of both attraction and repulsion, because each of them has certain pieces that’ll attract your What and certain pieces that’ll repel your What, because yes, just like everything else in this world, You are both a What and a WHO. Everything is. You are a What (which is how you've been measuring yourself so far), but your What also has a WHO. Therefore, you have a WHO.
When I state that we love based solely on WHOs and never on Whats, you may think that I'm insinuating that everybody is bisexual, and we all could learn to love any gender romantically (based on WHO they are, not What gender they have), but I'm not saying that. What I'm saying is that your gender (your What) can only create or destroy the opportunities for love with another person, but whether or not that opportunity is taken advantage of, and if they are loved or hated by you in the end, still depends on WHO you think they are.
"To hell with circumstances; I create opportunities."
- Bruce Lee
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In the case of a gold digger, she can at least stand to be around the man, or enough to marry or date him, when she NEVER would otherwise. This is because the man is a sacrifice made in the name of the money, not a bonus. Having money didn’t make her love him, but it did make him more acceptable as a negative or neutral attachment, because money aligned with WHO she is, and he had it. It made him more attractive to her, but sadly, attraction is not love. It is only a gateway to love. By this I mean that attraction creates the opportunity for love, but that love itself is an entirely separate thing. It's like unlocking a doorway for your feelings. Even if you opened up a locked gate for your feelings, that doesn't necessarily mean they'll walk through it. You can be attractive, without being loved. Give him an extremely ugly face and bad breath, and the WHOs behind those Whats may make him unbearable again, but perhaps not hated. Of course, taking away the money will be unpleasant for her as well. These negative Whats may grab someone's attention or interest, but that does not mean that they've created an opportunity for a loving relationship to be developed. In these cases, the Whats will lock the door, rather than unlock it. For a more visual look, let's pretend that you are the gold digger:

You see, the What, that is their money, allowed for one door to open towards loving them, but their other Whats don't match, because of What preferences you have in people (in looks, personality, etc) - or What insecurities you have, or god knows what else, isn't allowing for the hallway to be completely opened up, because one door is still locked, and so the emotional relationship between the two of you will never be born. If both your Whats and their Whats align with each other in a category, then they create the opportunity for both of your WHOs to then meet with each other, in that common ground. If they don't align, then no opportunities are created. Keep in mind, however, that even if both doors WERE open, that still doesn't mean that an emotion will be born. It just means that it COULD be. Your WHOs may decide not to walk down that hallway anyways. These hallways create emotional possibilities, but it does not necessarily capitalize on them. The combination of some quick Whats is exactly what creates the first impression that you’ll eventually get of anything. It creates a list of all of the opportunities you'll be willing to give to their WHO.
This is one of THE BIGGEST WAYS that a con man will enter your life. Because Whats are how we decide on our number of opportunities, great con men, psychics, or whatever, will make sure that all of the materialistic things you associate with them on first meeting will only be appealing to those that are easiest for their plan to work on. You want to con a nurse? Dress like a doctor. You want to con a grieving widow? Get out the crystal ball had head sashes. The more often What they are aligns with What you're looking for, the more leeway you'll give them when something "just doesn't feel right." (Feelings - of course, being your WHO's way of telling you to get the hell out of there, which is why you need to master them.)
We need to take a side track here to help you understand the difference between feelings and thoughts. It'll just take a moment, and then we'll really be getting somewhere.
You see, if Whats are about logic, and logically predicted futures, and WHOs are about emotions and experiencing each other in the present, then only Whats will be used in terms of creating a vision for the future, because that's what they're designed for. The details of What future you imagine, will be described in Whats, even to yourself, but how you feel about that idea, in the present, is created by WHOs. In short, Whats will connect you to your past, and your imagined futures, but WHOs can only be used as a measurement of the present, and how you feel "now", even if it's measuring what you're imagining, right now. This creates the possibility for your feelings about pros and cons in the analysis, for the emotional portion of your decisions. When you're viewing your memories or when you're imagining a future, the action of doing that is happening in the present moment, and so you can only tell if you feel good about it, based on how you feel about those thoughts and realities as you experience them, right "now". This is also why you can feel like the memory of an event is funny in hindsight, when in the moment you felt extremely embarrassed or even angry. You're feeling it right now, even as you remember a time that is... "not now", such as your past, and so you can feel two different ways about the exact same event, because you're creating your emotions at two very separate times.

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The Whats that something has are often used like a tally system to see if you should keep pushing forward towards really getting to know another WHO (Which would be unnecessary if you could see them right away) . It's like having mutliple hallways, or multiple different ways that you could connect emotionally from one WHO to another. In this case, like a maze, there are three whole chances that they may come to love each other, because the more doors you have opened (and unlocked by the combination of your Whats and the Whats of anything else), the more pathways that you'll have to emotionally connect with another item's, or another person's WHO. Depending on which you path you choose to take, different emotions can be felt and chosen between. Of course, the more locked doors, by the Whats, the less likely you are to really get close or emotionally connect with another WHO, and with one too many strikes, based on the limits set by your Whats, you're out of the game.
Like this:

Or This:

In this case, your repellent trait will be your impatience, or your laziness when it comes to checking all the different hallways that this relationship has to offer you. Believe me, if you checked all of the hallways, you'd almost certainly find at least one path that allowed for the both of you to get along, even with an inanimate object.
Plus, different people have different amounts of strikes needed. After all, it is technically What limit they have on their number of attempts (or knocks on a door) needed, no? Some people are just too lazy or too busy (or any other What) to really work hard at getting to know you.
Con men are very good, therefore, at giving you certain things (certain Whats) as keys to help keep the doors open long enough for them to trick you. This is often done during "the convincer" stage of any con (We'll be getting more into this in another book.)
For example, the con artist may tell you about a magical machine that can duplicate money (an actual scam from the olden days), and when you start to doubt him (as you should) he will GIVE YOU schematics for the machine (all garbledy-gook, but that gift creates just enough doubt for you to keep listening). Best yet, he could ask you for $50, take it to his machine to let it "sit over night", and then the next day, hand you $100 (He'll sell you the machine for $1,000 later). This last one is what we call "A Rigged Success".
The same attraction or repulsion principle can be said of the Whats behind any relationship, including the one you have with yourself and others. The better your unlocked to locked ratio is, (based on the types of Whats you both have), the higher number of chances you'll have with a prospect. This is why, if a man is not gay (That What being the type of sexual preference he has), and he sees a person with a male’s reproductive anatomy (identifying What gender they have), he'll immediately become turned off. Those Whats have locked him out enough that a romantic relationship has a calculated allowance of zero chances. The partner has a WHO he may like, but it also has a What. That What is his gender, and it's separating their WHOs away from each other, weakening the bond.
For the two men, if they're both straight, the romance hallway looks like this:

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They may still be friends, but that's due to the further separation between the What that is their gender, and the WHO of their possible relationship. Different end points means different doors in between, which means different keys (Whats) that would be needed to form a real connection. A woman on the other hand may often have an allowance of at least one chance for this type of man, because her gender unlocked at least one door for this to happen.

Keep in mind however, that different brains are wired in unique ways, and so while the above picture may be your blueprint for the dynamic, their starting point will be different, and they will often have a different blueprint of their own. It's like trying to get into the same room from two different parts of a huge mansion. If you start on the upstairs balcony, and they start from the basement, in order to emotionally meet each other at a third party WHO (in order for your feelings to compromise), you will most likely have to go downstairs from the third floor, but they will most likely have to travel upstairs from the first floor. You both could get to the same room labeled "friendship" if all of the correct doors are unlocked, but the different paths that you take to get there can mean that you both may feel different types of emotions by the time you arrive. This is the trickiest part to control for most con men, (but that's not to say it's super difficult).
Keep in mind, that because you can both reach "the friendship room" from your different starting points, that means that you can still both reach each other's rooms, through that middle point. Over time, you will tend to walk right through the middle ground, and into their own WHO as well.
Usually however, after walking to the friendship zone, both of your WHOs will be too tired to keep walking just to see a different room right away, especially when they've already met with WHO they wanted to meet in the form of a newly found relationship. Maybe after a break they'll try pushing further. Still, as I've stated, even though this creates the opportunity for you to see their room, and for them to see yours, it doesn't mean that you'll take the steps to do it, even if the doors are unlocked. Besides, even if you do see their room, it still might not be a room that you'll fall in love with, and they may not fall in love with your room either. It just means that you'd have a chance to, since you now know what kind of person they are, instead of having no chance at all.
Of course, if you can reach their room, and they can reach yours, and you both fall in love with the other's room (fall in love with the WHOs since the doorways allowed for you to meet them) then you’re both in love. People can start off as friends, or even strangers (a different type of relationship, like walking past each other on the street), and eventually find out that they've fallen in love. Keep in mind though, that just because the door to the room is unlocked, that doesn't mean that once you go inside you must fall in love with the room. In fact, even if the door is unlocked, (even if you, specifically, kept it unlocked so that they'd come to love you) that doesn't mean that they have to walk through it, and take a look at it at all. I can't stress this enough. Note to yourself, even if you're both living in the same world, don't assume that others have started their goal-chasing from the same place that you have. If I had to describe a WHO in the simplest, and yet most vague form, I'd say that it is the unique world, for others to explore, that is you. Con men know how to explore this world BEFORE trying to swindle you. They study this because, again, even if you get to the room, that doesn't mean that you'll fall in love with it based on your WHO. In terms of desire WHOs are crucial, and so for a man that makes you desire anything, he first needs to know WHO you are, and craft an outcome that matches that.
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A possibility is not a certainty, and Whats will only be creating those possibilities, for you to feel things. They can only create, or deny, opportunities for you to feel. For example, you may love a man because of how you perceive WHO he is, as an idea, based on his Whats, but if you then find out that he murdered somebody? Well, you will fall out of love with him pretty quickly, because What he is (A murderer) has shut the door on love, and so you can't feel love anymore. That opportunity has now been denied. Heck! It probably locked all of the doors except for hatred, fear, and disgust, and so now you will only feel a mixture of those, or a singular one, at any given time, and when you think of him. This is because WHO he is can't possibly be what you had imagined, because your larger idea of "WHO he was" could never have contained something so vulgar inside of it, especially not something as vulgar as a murder. A person with murder as a What, to the victim's family, will mean hatred, because of WHO the family is, WHO the victim is, and WHO they feel the perpetrator must be. In short, emotions can be capitalized on differently depending on all of the WHOs involved at any given time. It's the same What, allowing for the same emotions, but based the WHOs involved (WHO they are, and WHOs judging them), different emotions will take charge of that opportunity, and only certain doorways will be passed through.
Different Whats allow for different emotions. Some Whats will lock all the doors that lead to positive rooms, and some Whats will unlock certain doors that make it so that you're more likely to feel negatively. The big thing to keep in mind here is that Whats are sort of biased creatures. Depending on WHO you are, those Whats will open different sets of doors for different people. For example, with the murder, some more casual onlookers will only view those actions as disgusting or scary, like people watching real-life crime shows on TV, without feeling that true hatred, that comes with a loss and knowing that your loved one was taken from you in an unjust manner.
To some very messed up people, that What, called murder, may actually allow them to feel better towards the criminal. Think about copycat killers or terrorists. This is what makes our society's overuse of Whats so scary for me. They can be used, viewed, and twisted, in infinite ways to Sunday, and so biases, blame games, and the ability to hate, run rampant, because you can always twist a What into a bad thing, and since the ease of hating everyone outweighs the ability to love those that are different from you for many people, that possibility will be taken advantage of by those with a hunger for power, and a greed for everything else. If your reality is based on Whats then your reality can become skewed by those around you, and greedy people will take advantage of that.

Also note that this means some people will have an easier time getting to what they want than you will, since their travels may, figuratively, be a downhill battle. They can take an unlocked elevator (due to What money they have) down to fame on the one hundredth floor, while you have to run up the stairs, on 100 landings, just to reach the same space (since you didn't have their amount of money, their elevator was locked to you, based on the different Whats). It's also why, another person may not want to date you, but you will still want to date them. You had all the right doors to find the room labeled "have a crush", but for them, from where their standing, either the doors are locked and they can't love you, or the doors are opened, but they haven't let their feelings walk down those hallways yet.
Sometimes, this is simply "Fate's" way of controlling us as well. WHO we want (Be it a person, an item, an action, or any other goal that we identify with) is sometimes never granted an opportunity to be had by the Whats that we are given, or not given. If a prisoner at a high security prison wanted to go home and visit his wife and kids, but had no legal way of doing so, according to What sentence he’s been given and What rules his overseers had, and no other Whats to get him there (Like if Whatever plans he had to break out didn’t work, for example.) then no matter how much he may have wanted to go home, or have hated to stay where he was, there was simply no opportunity granted to him, by his Whats, to get what he desired. In short, to me, the world is made up entirely of two things, our WHOs and our Whats.
WHOs are the sources of free will, and choice.
Whats are the sources for destined opportunities, and the lack thereof.
If the two are compatible with one another, you get what you want. If not? Not so much. To this degree, I am a compatibilist.
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This is not to say that a gay man couldn't have loved a male partner if they were female. It's only to say that, this option simply doesn't matter, because the prospect is not female in this case, and so all opportunities are null and void. Another example is that if two people have lived in completely separate parts of the world and never met (What locations they visited, even virtually), then even if their WHOs were made to feel passionately in love with each other based on WHO they are, that fact is meaningless, because these WHOs will never interact anyways, and this is due to their Whats. The same can be said for our interactions with anything, or any WHO, as well.
"A man who grasps principles can successfully select his own methods. A man who tries methods, ignoring principles, is sure to have trouble."
- Ralph Waldo Emerson
It’s facts like these that give us a strange glimmer of hope for ourselves. If you know the most common thing holding you back from loving yourself, is that you feel that you've had too many failed chances, or don't have enough good things, or something like that, this is great, because that was based on your Whats. If you feel like this and are reading my site, then my site might just be the best keys to your freedom. This book will help you love yourself and others, not based on your Whats, but by your WHOs. This allows you to establish any number of chances for you to give, to others, to yourself, or even to your goals and items because you'll be able to see far more doors than before, since the container for these doors (the blueprint for the house) is based on the WHO behind any given relationship, even with inanimate objects, or future goals, and so on. You'll have a legitimate map to base your attempts on, rather than just stumbling around blindly like some type of wild animal.
Because of these complex systems, and all of their layers, many people can feel happy for a time but rarely any of us stay truly satisfied. Almost every good WHO will have some sort of bad What attached to it, and almost every bad WHO will have some sort of good What attached to it. Almost everything you love has a repellent piece, and everything you hate has an attractive piece, and just because something attracts you, it doesn't mean you feel love for them. A classic example? Addictive drugs. This is often a classic Yin and Yang situation. Luckily, there are a few exceptions to this rule. Unluckily, they are rarely ever universal, or for everyone, and so you’ll have to go out on your own and find them for yourself. Finding one of those in a person, is what’s called true love. Finding one of those in actions and intention, is what’s called your purpose in life. They are hard to find, but that’s not to say that they’re not out there, and they are definitely worth searching for. My friends, that is what this book is here for. I can help you find the things that are only attractive to you, and the life that will only be fulfilling for you to live.
If you want a better example of Whats attracting Whats without emotion (attraction is a very common type of opportunity that's created in order for two or more WHOs to meet), consider the right skills (the right set of Whats) attracting success (another What). Success doesn't love your skills, but you'll have a much easier time attracting success, with the proper skills and tools, because it'll be given many more opened, and unlocked trap doors for it to fall into and be captured by you, who's been waiting at the bottom this whole time.
NOTE: Since saying "The WHOS behind the Whats" would be extremely annoying to read after a while, if two items are different sizes (or on different layers), I will be using the terms "attraction" and "repellence"/"repulsion" to describe that it's a What creating the connection between a smaller piece and a larger WHO, and I'll use "love", "desire", "fear", "hate", and similiar words, to describe when two similarly layered WHOs meet with each other. For more info on what I mean by layers, it'll be discussed in a mere three chapters after this one. An easier way to simplify this is to think of it as Whats attracting or repelling other Whats WITHOUT emotion, and WHOs loving or hating other WHOs with Complete emotion.
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This is also why finding out that your crush has similar hobbies and tastes to you is often considered a good sign. If their WHO matches with the WHO behind certain Whats and so do yours, chances are that, at least within those categories, both of your WHOs are aligned, which further goes to boost, and fortify your love for each other. It creates a chain of WHOs by which to connect yourself to your partner and vice versa. Your WHO connects with the WHO behind a What (a hobby, let's say), and that WHO also connects with the WHO of your partner, thereby creating a new link, between you, and the one you love. Of course, as stated previously, this will not make you love them, or them love you. It is simply a good form of proof that your love deserves to exist in this world. It's not the cause, but it is a very nice bi-product. This may also explain why you believe that stating all these nice things about them means that you’re explaining why you love them, because it’s actually pretty darn close to accurate. It's not that they have these nice Whats, and so you're more likely to love them. It's that you love them, and so they're more likely to have these nice Whats.
This also applies to you, and self-love. It's not that a lot of What you are is amazing, and so you come love yourself. It's that you love yourself, and so a lot of What you are seems amazing to you. It's not that Whats will make you love yourself if you have no self-love already. It's that, if your self-love is hidden, then by adding a chain of Whats that loop from you, back to your truest self, you then can feel justified in your secret self-love, and can then act on it more publicly, removing the "secretive" portion. This last bit is what leads to the illusion that having nice things will make you happy. You can't see that someone else loves themselves secretly, (that is the point, after all) and that they do it with a bit of shame behind that emotion. You can only see how they act, which will not reveal their innermost feelings, especially not feelings that even they aren't aware they have.
This means that after finding enough evidence (Whats that create a chain), to think that loving themselves is an okay thing to do publicly, you will see them doing so and assume that they didn't love themselves at first, but that their Whats is what gave it to them. The truth is that they already loved themselves all along, just with a bit too much fear to show it publicly. If What they had gained was a lot of money, then they may express their love in the category of themselves called "the financial role", but probably not with their actual WHO, because their WHO doesn't have enough evidence that it's okay go public yet. The truth, my friends, is that for many of us though, people just fake that happiness because they think it's how they should feel when they get what they want, but that isn't necessarily the case, because... if you don't already feel connected to yourself, then "buying yourself a gift" just seems weird and forced. Just buying chocolates for a person won't make them fall in love with you, but giving chocolates on Valentine’s Day, to someone who already loves you? Maybe then, they'll have the courage to reciprocate, and tell you how they truly feel.
The process of finding your truest WHO, is basically just a very long, very difficult, and often, a very boring, form of the dating process. You're just going to have to go on a blind date with yourself. I know! I know. If someone said to me that "Your blind date doesn't really look that nice, but they do have a great personality." I'd probably be worried, too. I'd be worried that they're trying to justify the date with some unmeasurable thing because there's nothing better that they can use to sell the person, but in truth, getting to know WHO your date is, and understanding their personality really WILL always be more important than just finding out their income - or their body, and so much more, in the long run. Sometimes, it's the things that you can't fully comprehend, or understand, that makes everything worthwhile (Again, your personality is not WHO you are either. It's just What personality you have. I was just using it as a common example here for something that is hard to measure in a single date, like a WHO!).
And this is especially true in love, because you can't force logic on an illogical thing without seriously damaging its worth, and love is anything but logical.
Sometimes? Sometimes it's better be illogical, and to just see where that feeling takes you.
To an extent.
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Before getting into the different ways to use a true WHO, I’d like to take some time to explain how to use changes in your Whats, to create the most powerful and easiest to acquire changes in your life. If you can embrace these unexamined principles of life, you can change nearly anything you’d like, or at least have the opportunities to do so for others, in their lives.
After you spend time away from this page, you may wish to think about what it is that you truly want in life, truly need in life. People who become confident that they know everything in this world, or in this book, haven't really seen the fullest picture, and there are few things in this world as deadly as one's own misplaced beliefs. This is the last chapter that you will be allowed to read for free in this book. You may want to save your money, but you need to save your soul, and the souls of those you love.
You want comfort, but you need power, and the potential to protect.
So now you have to ask yourself:
Are you the type of person to put your wants, above your needs...
Or the other way around?
This is the last free page of this book. If you want to read more for free, you can read the other free samples from other books.
But again, FULL Membership, Early Access, Personalized Coaching, And More are only available to people who can think like a magician. So if you can’t find the hidden link, this is the last page for you.
Good Luck!
